FIFA press release - Behind The Goals

**montego** · 11-20-2009, 10:10 PM

FIFA has released the following press release today----

In view of the wholly unfair outcome of last nights match, FIFA have decided to alter the constitution of the association.
1/ All future World Cups WC,s will be held in ROI. This will eliminate the need for ROI to qualify. They will automatically be entered as Hosts.

2/ Since the ROI will no longer have to play Qualifying games so denying them the income from games, FIFA will compensate them financially. This will be calculated using a unique Irish invention
first used in the Irish province of East Glasgow, and called "the Sevull Calculator". This informs us that at least 15,000,000 Irish supporters would attend every home game. FAI will be compensated for this lose of income.

3/ Since ROI have no facillities to host the WC, FIFA will build 20 new stadiums for them in Ireland .
All these stadiums will be constructed in Kafflick areas. No Proddies will be permitted to walk to, or attend any match, since the Irish find such people walking to be offensive.

4/ Fields of Athenrye will become the new WC anthem and all other national Anthems will be illegal since the Irish find them offensive.

5/ No country with the national colours of Red, White and Blue will be permitted to enter the WC since the Irish find these colours offensive.

6/ Since Holland play in Orange , the previous rule applies to them in spades.

7/ Since hand balls against the Irish will not be allowed, the Sharia law of cutting off the hands will be introduced for all Irelands opponents.

With this new constitution, FIFA hope to eliminate years of discrimination against the Irish and to help them get over their paranoia and victimhood. The above rules will also apply for all Celtic FC games as well.

**billyboy** · 11-20-2009, 10:12 PM

Can see the pigs flying past the window - good one mate

**bigjie** · 11-20-2009, 10:15 PM

ffs montego kidding or not , that is one shit post , tons of offending stuff in there.

**Foxy** · 11-20-2009, 10:20 PM

i know you meant it as a joke and i can always laugh at our misfortune etc but that is poorly put together and offensive to be fair.

**mac1309** · 11-26-2009, 06:53 PM

Where's Seanchai??
posted in jest probably mate but,a bit too raw for the site.

Wrist slapping in post for you!!

**spanishtomo** · 11-26-2009, 07:08 PM

Quite humourous mate. Laugh at ourselves first them we can laugh at others with impunity

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11-20-2009, 10:10 PM	#1
montego Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: linwood Posts: 11,763 Credits: 6,606,208 Items	FIFA press release FIFA has released the following press release today---- In view of the wholly unfair outcome of last nights match, FIFA have decided to alter the constitution of the association. 1/ All future World Cups WC,s will be held in ROI. This will eliminate the need for ROI to qualify. They will automatically be entered as Hosts. 2/ Since the ROI will no longer have to play Qualifying games so denying them the income from games, FIFA will compensate them financially. This will be calculated using a unique Irish invention first used in the Irish province of East Glasgow, and called "the Sevull Calculator". This informs us that at least 15,000,000 Irish supporters would attend every home game. FAI will be compensated for this lose of income. 3/ Since ROI have no facillities to host the WC, FIFA will build 20 new stadiums for them in Ireland . All these stadiums will be constructed in Kafflick areas. No Proddies will be permitted to walk to, or attend any match, since the Irish find such people walking to be offensive. 4/ Fields of Athenrye will become the new WC anthem and all other national Anthems will be illegal since the Irish find them offensive. 5/ No country with the national colours of Red, White and Blue will be permitted to enter the WC since the Irish find these colours offensive. 6/ Since Holland play in Orange , the previous rule applies to them in spades. 7/ Since hand balls against the Irish will not be allowed, the Sharia law of cutting off the hands will be introduced for all Irelands opponents. With this new constitution, FIFA hope to eliminate years of discrimination against the Irish and to help them get over their paranoia and victimhood. The above rules will also apply for all Celtic FC games as well.

11-20-2009, 10:12 PM	#2
billyboy Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Staffordshire Posts: 12,762 Credits: 2,070,693 Items	Can see the pigs flying past the window - good one mate

11-20-2009, 10:15 PM	#3
bigjie stirring the pot Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: at the bar Posts: 9,659 Credits: 12,993,181,306 Items	ffs montego kidding or not , that is one shit post , tons of offending stuff in there.

11-20-2009, 10:20 PM	#4
Foxy Under the forum bonnet Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Ireland Age: 28 Posts: 13,618 Credits: 13,002,020,968 Items	i know you meant it as a joke and i can always laugh at our misfortune etc but that is poorly put together and offensive to be fair.

11-26-2009, 06:53 PM	#5
mac1309 Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 497 Credits: 79,277	Where's Seanchai?? posted in jest probably mate but,a bit too raw for the site. Wrist slapping in post for you!!

11-26-2009, 07:08 PM	#6
spanishtomo Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Spain Posts: 648 Credits: 65,857	Quite humourous mate. Laugh at ourselves first them we can laugh at others with impunity